I am sitting here watching it try to snow in the typical way Seattle gets snow this time of year. It tries really hard…but it just isn’t cold enough. Sometimes we get lucky, though, and I have fond memories of Christmases that were white.

I came across a great article a friend posted on Facebook about acts of empathy. You can read it here.

It’s been a challenging Fall season for a lot of us. We had a difficult election process and outcome which still seems mired in so much madness. What I have learned from all of this is how divided we still are. And as I have talked about in previous posts, fear and anger is what will keep us divided. I think that’s exactly the way the “powers that be” want us to be. The reason why I say that is because if we are in anger or fear mode, then we are easier to manipulate…and let’s face it, we live in a country where making money is more important than our humanity, so it makes for a good stock market, and all the products and services that somehow “help” us feel better. Someone is making money off of it, I promise.

That all aside…as I don’t want this post to be a rant about the state of political affairs and how I see it, I would rather talk about empathy and friendship.

In my former job I had to go out of my way to connect with all kinds of interesting, sometimes strange, sometimes weird, sometimes incredibly awesome people. Because of that experience I have an open mind to everyone I meet. I always try to find something good or in common with the person standing in front of me. I make a conversation with them and engage them in talking about themselves or something they are doing, or something they are passionate about.

Because of my interest in connecting with people I can’t tell you how many gifts I have received. I don’t mean physical gifts, but gifts of the heart. I recently had a conversation with a lovely woman at my local grocery store. She is a checker there, and my husband and I have gotten to know her over the years. She told me that her husband has been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer and a rare, difficult form of dementia. He has about three months to live, and the only good thing about it is the cancer will take him before the dementia will. She has four grown daughters.

I just stood there and listened to her. It was one of those situations where just the act of listening and being of support, and offering empathy, kindness, and compassion was all that was required. I wished I could have done more, but sometimes being there for someone you don’t know very well in such a way is all that is required. She is in my thoughts a lot right now, and I wish for her strength during a most difficult time.

I probably have mentioned this before, but I highly recommend reading a book called “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen Covey. The book opens with a story about a gentleman on a plane and how irritated he is with another passenger and his child. The child was acting out and causing unrest on the flight. The gentleman kept judging the passenger and his son during the flight, ramping up his irritation, and it wasn’t until they landed that this gentleman had a conversation with this other man and found out that he had just suffered a terrible loss and it explained why his young son was so distraught during the flight.

The gentleman then shifted his awareness from judgment to empathy.

I really feel that empathy is what is grossly missing from humanity these days. To me it is about getting out of myself realizing that it is not always about me. It’s also about the other humans I am interacting with.

I recently found out that a friend of mine has unfriended me from Facebook. And I am pretty sure it is because I am not a Trump supporter. She made it clear on her posts prior to the election that she was a Trump supporter. I engaged her conversation prior to the election about a particular view, and I told her that our friendship was more important than politics. She did not respond to this comment, and it wasn’t until a few days ago did I realize that she had unfriended me.

Sadly I think the lack of empathy and a quick movement to judgement is what has caused the unfriending event. We get so stuck in our views, stories, and stereotypes that we can’t see the bigger picture and shift to empathy.

Life goes on no doubt…I wish for all of us a beautiful season full of kindness, love, and compassion. Even the small efforts of empathy can change the world.